The Honeymoon is Over

Sam's 'Love - Love' relationship with Ben has turned into a 'Love - Hate May Not Like You So Much' relationship.  Along with that, we've seen some regression from Sam.  Yes, it's been smooth sailing up until now...well, up until the last few weeks maybe.

Sam says things like "I don't like my brother," or "I don't want Ben anymore," or even "I don't want a brother, I want a sister."  Earlier this week, he told Pop he didn't want him to hold Ben.  If someone is talking to Ben, Sam tries to talk over them to get their attention.  We expected this type of behavior, but didn't expect it to sneak up on us 3 months after Ben was born.  I guess the novelty is gone, Sam realizes life as we knew it is no longer (which has, honestly, been hard for me to come to grips with too), and Ben is not going anywhere.  The most ironic part is that two weeks ago in music class one of the grandmas asked to hold Ben...grandmas just can't resist babies...and after just a few minutes of Ben being in her lap Sam came to tell me, "I want Ben back now."  And he wasn't holding him or even sitting in my lap with him, but he did not like someone else holding him.  Such emotion.  How tough it must be to be a three year figuring out how to be a big brother for the first time.  Where's the handbook for this?

Sam has also been acting out...tearing things up (namely dad's plants), talking back, angry outbursts, yelling at us occasionally.  There are lots of tears around here lately.  And, he's started peeing in his pants on purpose.  Last night I went in his room after he went to bed because he was crying.  After we talked about what was wrong, Sam started sucking his thumb and told me, "Mom, I'm sucking my thumb like Ben."

I guess the good news is that "this too shall pass"...I just hope we don't cause any permanent damage in the process...Ha!  It's often difficult to figure out the best way to handle these things in a time like this.  The other day John said it was a good thing Sam is his own flesh and blood...otherwise...well...

And the other good news.  We had our year end parent-teacher conference with Sam's teacher last week.  She told us none of this behavior has carried over into school.  He's still the wonderful-sweet-sometimesdoingsomethinghe'snotsupposedto-angel she's always known him to be.  A relief to know that his misbehavior is clearly attempts to get more attention from us...since he's having to share us now, and...this too shall pass.